Why I Hate Appointments, Part 2

“I need you to look at a rash,” said a Loews guest. “But I have meetings all day and dinner tonight. Could you be at my room at 9?”

He meant 9 p.m. His call arrived at 9 a.m. Appointments more than a few hours ahead end badly more often than not, so I avoid them.

“I’m always available,” I said. “But we’re both busy people. Phone just before you get to your room, and I’ll come over.”

He phoned at 7 p.m. to say he’d be delayed till 10. I waited at home. He phoned at 9:30 to say he was on his way. I arrived at 10. No one answered when I knocked. He appeared at 10:20 with apologies.

A Message From a Stranger

“A guest would like to meet you at 4:15 in the lobby.”

The caller was a concierge at the L.A. Hotel.

“Is that all?”

“I’m sorry, Doctor Oppenheim. The guest just made the request and walked off.”

This really happened a few years ago. Doesn’t it sound like a bad novel? Retired CIA agent, Skip Oppenheim gets a message from a mysterious stranger as he unwinds at a luxurious hotel. The adventure begins.

As a hotel doctor, I am allergic to adventures. Sick guests rarely schedule a consultation in a public place. Most likely he had a request. I prefer to handle these over the phone at no charge. This is good P.R. but it’s also self-defense. If I travel to the hotel, and the guest makes a request I have to refuse, the consequences may not be life-threatening but they are not pleasant. Also, it’s hard to collect my fee.

“I don’t make appointments without talking to the guest first. Do you have his number?”

“I’m afraid not.”

“Have him call when he gets back. I’m sure we can work out something.”

The concierge agreed. Sadly for this post, there is no punch line. I never heard from him.

Why I Discourage Appointments

“The guest will be in the room at six o’clock and would like to see you then,” announced the concierge at two o’clock.

Tactfully, I suggested that she not make appointments without consulting me. The Torrance Marriott is eighteen miles away, and I didn't want to drive across town during the rush hour to see someone who wasn’t sick enough to leave work. I phoned to tell the guest that I could come immediately or at nine p.m. She chose nine.

Arriving ten minutes early, I knocked, and no one responded. Reached by cell phone, the guest reminded me that the visit was scheduled for nine. She was dining nearby, she added, and would hurry back. Twenty minutes passed before she arrived, but during that time another hotel phoned with a visit on my way home, so it looked like a good evening.

The guest arrived, apologized, and described her problem, a minor eye irritation. After I finished she mentioned that her husband felt under the weather. This is usually pleasant news because this couple had travel insurance. My routine is to ask the patient to phone the insurance to obtain approval, so I could care for him and be paid. But obtaining authorization takes time. It was late, and I was anxious to see the next patient who seemed genuinely ill, so I treated the husband’s cold gratis and hurried off.