tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8468200901036899832024-03-07T20:51:10.006-08:00The Hotel DoctorThe experiences of a Los Angeles hotel and housecall doctor.Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.comBlogger546125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-7379356345204778012021-02-01T06:44:00.004-08:002021-02-01T06:44:45.611-08:00The last post on this blog - but I'm continuing on another<p>For mysterious reasons, Google has stopped indexing this blog, so you few loyal readers are among only a dozen or two that can still find me. I've tried and appealed to many support groups, but no one has helped.</p><p>Finally I decided to continue this in a new blog with a new name and a different E-mail hoping Google would lift the ban. I changed the name to "The Housecall Doctor." At this point it doesn't look good because if you Google "The Housecall Doctor" the new blog doesn't turn up. But you can reach it by entering the link "thehousecalldoctor.blogspot.com.<br /></p>Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-17410158499570516882021-02-01T06:21:00.003-08:002021-02-01T06:21:20.799-08:00A Dog-Eat-Dog Business, Part 11<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“This is Doctor Oppenheim,” I repeated several times
before hanging up. Caller ID identified the Doubletree in Santa Monica, so I
phoned to ask if someone had requested a doctor. Someone had. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“You answered, but you couldn’t hear me,” said the
guest. “So I called the front desk again, and they gave me a different number.
Another doctor is coming.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">That was upsetting because the Doubletree is a
regular. When asked, the guest gave me the 800 number of Hotel Doctors
International, a service based in Miami. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“How much are they charging?” I asked. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“I don’t know. They just asked if I had insurance.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">That was a red flag. Many hotel doctor agencies charge
spectacular fees and then assure guests that travel insurance will reimburse
them. Forewarned of our rapacious medical system, foreign travelers rarely make
a fuss – and foreign travel insurance generally pays outrageous fees. But
American insurance doesn’t. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I told the guest, an American, that my fee was $300
and that he should call the agency and ask what it charged. It turned out to be
$650 (far from the largest I’ve heard), so I made the housecall. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Afterward, standing on tiptoes to peer over the front
desk, I saw the colorful business card of Hotel Doctors International stuck on
the counter. The clerk, who had insisted that mine was the only number she
knew, expressed surprise when I pointed it out.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> </span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-84554323594179902002021-01-28T07:14:00.005-08:002021-01-28T07:14:48.886-08:00All In a Day's Work<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“She speaks Spanish. I’m not sure what’s going on, but
she needs a doctor.”</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> The caller was the night manager at the Torrance
Marriott. The hotel rarely calls, but I go regularly for crew of LAN, Chilean
Airlines. An LAN crewperson who falls ill is supposed to call her supervisor
who calls the central office who calls Federal Assist, a travel insurer, who
calls Inn House Doctor, a national housecall agency who calls its answering
service who then calls me. The guest hadn’t followed the procedure. If I made a
housecall at her request, getting paid would be a major hassle. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> I phoned the answering service which had no idea what
do. I phoned Federal Assist who insisted it wasn’t responsible for arranging
visits. I phoned the director of Inn House Doctor to alert him to the problem.
Then I waited.</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> It was 5 a.m. It’s dangerous to make these housecalls
before official approval because it may never arrive. But the rush hour was
about to begin, and I couldn’t resist. I jumped in my car and drove the twenty
miles to the Marriott. The freeway moved smoothly, but two blocks before the
hotel, barriers and police cars blocked traffic. A dead body had been found on
the street. That I was a doctor making a housecall did not persuade the
guard.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span> <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I parked and walked toward the hotel. A policeman
hurried over as I passed the barrier, but he accepted my explanation and
escorted me past the tent concealing the body.</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> The visit was easy, and official approval arrived
while I was in the room. When I finished at 7:00, my sigalert revealed a solid
red line of jammed freeway for my return. So I returned to my car, tilted the
seat back, and went to sleep. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> </span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-40862741522066938512021-01-24T07:53:00.000-08:002021-01-24T07:53:34.203-08:00The European Plague<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“I have the European plague. I need a doctor.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“Excuse me?...” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“I have the European plague. I need a doctor for the
American plague.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“I’m not sure what you mean.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“My child is in the bathroom with the European plague.
Can you bring the doctor?” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">What was he talking about?.... The exchange continued
for some time until the light dawned. This was the fourth occasion this has
happened in over thirty years and 30,000 phone calls. The guest had phoned the
front desk because his electrical devices used European outlets which are
different from ours. He needed an “adapter.” The clerk, not listening
carefully, had heard “a doctor” and forwarded his call to me. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">But I was also not listening carefully. It’s human
nature to hear what you expect to hear, so I assumed that the caller had a
medical problem. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I had heard “European plague” when he had said
“European plug.” He had not said “my child is in the bathroom” but “my shaver
is in the bathroom….”</span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-87386051016792528542021-01-20T06:23:00.002-08:002021-01-20T06:23:27.257-08:00Good Luck<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">A national housecall service connected me with a guest
at the Montage in Beverly Hills. She was suffering the flu; I told her I’d
arrive in half an hour. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">As soon as I hung up, I realized, to my dismay, that I
had quoted my usual fee, forgetting that the housecall service takes a 40
percent cut. The Montage is a super-luxury hotel, and the guest was probably
rich, but I couldn’t change the fee. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I was in luck. Not one but three guests in the room
had the flu, so it worked out.</span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-43659499366596939942021-01-16T07:53:00.001-08:002021-01-16T07:54:18.199-08:00Vomiters Hate Waiting<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">A hotel guest phoned to ask when I’d arrive. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">“In about fifteen minutes.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">On her initial call, I had told her I would arrive in an hour, and I
was on schedule, so the call meant that she was still vomiting. Vomiters are
impatient. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">My database shows 2,328 entries for “gastroenteritis” (the common
stomach flu). It’s my second leading diagnosis and far more satisfying than
“upper respiratory infection” (4,584). Both are almost always incurable, but
gastroenteritis rarely lasts more than a day; patients give me credit when it
goes away. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">The guest greeted me at the door, a good sign. A guest in bed is OK,
sprawled on the bathroom floor is not good. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">I asked the usual questions and did not interrupt as she delivered a
precise, item by item, account of dinner. Everyone blames an upset stomach on
their last meal, a belief as correct as most popular health beliefs. I gave the
usual advice which included telling her to stop what she was doing (putting
fluid into her stomach as fast as it came out) and to suck on ice and wait. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">I gave the usual antivomiting injection and two packets of pills which
I had pocketed before leaving so I wouldn’t have to remember to restock my bag. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">When I phoned later, she told me that she had recovered and thanked me for curing her. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;"> </span></p>
<p> </p>Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-78618297335032274102021-01-12T06:00:00.008-08:002021-01-12T06:05:08.501-08:00Christmas Day<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14pt;">A travel insurer reported a sick child at the Anaheim
Holiday Inn, near Disneyland forty miles away. Freeway traffic was tolerable,
but when I arrived and knocked no one answered. <br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">I walked around the lobby. With
my suit, beard, and black bag, I look like a doctor in an old Hollywood movie,
but no one responded. A waitress in the hotel restaurant asked at everyone’s
table, but no one admitted calling a doctor. <br /></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">I drove away in a good mood. When
hotel guests call and then disappear, I’m out of luck, but travel insurers pay
for no-show visits.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"><span style="font-size: large;">I was a mile from home when the
insurer called. The mother was on the line, claiming she had been waiting in
the hotel. So
I drove back to Anaheim.
To my everlasting credit, I was entirely pleasant to the mother, waving off her
excuses. The child had a cold.</span> <br /></span></span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-61001677206341408592021-01-08T06:54:00.002-08:002021-01-08T06:54:18.461-08:00Another Easy Visit<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I drove to Glendale to care for an elderly Argentine lady who had been
vomiting. That can be a tricky problem in an old person, but she was
recovering, so I felt comfortable leaving her with advice and medication. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">During the visit, I had the experience of listening to someone with a
thick Spanish accent denounce Mexicans. She had eaten in a Mexican restaurant
and was certain the spicy food made her ill. Argentina is a country with
extensive cattle ranches and a largely meat and potatoes diet.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-78726790219728605432021-01-04T07:19:00.002-08:002021-01-04T07:19:18.052-08:00Another Failure of Communication<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“My son with pain in ear. Maybe he need a doctor.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“I can come to the hotel.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“Not today. I give medicine. Maybe if he has pain tomorrow.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“So you’ll call me tomorrow?” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“Yes. Can you come in the morning?” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“Yes.”</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> “When.”</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> “I can be there between 10 and 1.”<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>Strictly speaking, I can come at any time, but I like to avoid driving
during the rush hour.</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> “Three hours is too long. We want to visit the city.”</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> “You said you’d call tomorrow. When you call, I’ll tell you exactly
when I’ll be there.”</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> “OK.”</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Most guests who promise to call never call, so I put the matter out of
my mind. After noon the following day, the phone rang. It was the concierge at
that hotel. “I’m afraid we’ve had a complaint, Doctor Oppenheim,” she said.
“Mr. Desai in 403 says he and his family have been waiting over three hours.
Are you going to come?....” </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> </span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-8176482717206936632020-12-31T06:23:00.001-08:002020-12-31T06:23:12.060-08:00Good Insurance<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">The caller spoke with a Hispanic accent, so I assumed
he was a travel insurer, and I was right. It was StandbyMD, one of the good
insurers. It phones; I make the visit; I fax an invoice; it sends a check.
Latin Americans make up most of its clients, but anyone can sign up. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">A guest at the Sheraton Four Points had been awake all
night with an earache. The call arrived at 4:30 a.m., but that’s almost my time
of rising, so I was not unhappy. Freeway traffic was light. I was at his room
in half an hour. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">One thing seemed strange. His name sounded American.
This is not rare in Latin American countries, but he also spoke flawless
English. He told me his pain began soon after he boarded a plane in Managua. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“So you live in Nicaragua?” I asked. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“No. Vancouver,” he said. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">The light dawned. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“Of course,” I added. “You’re Canadian. No American
would have such good insurance.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">American travelers buy American travel insurance. When
they fall ill, they obtain care and then submit a claim to the insurer which
pays as much as their fee schedule pays. Our insurers take a dim view of
housecalls, so their reimbursement is not generous.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can’t remember caring for an American hotel
guest and then billing one of the dozen travel insurers that use me.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> </span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-28818304528367870782020-12-27T02:53:00.004-08:002020-12-27T02:53:23.349-08:00More Evidence of America's Leadership<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Opening an envelope from an international travel
insurer, I expected a check but found only a form letter containing a dozen
boxes, each listing a reason why payment was denied. An “X” through one box
revealed that I had not submitted my invoice on an HCFA-1500. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">That’s the claim form American doctors send to
American health insurers. It’s complex, full of codes, questions, boxes, and
charges – far longer than my simple invoice. Despite this, it’s badly
organized. One must enter today’s date three times. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I found an HCFA form and filled it out, leaving many
cryptic questions blank, guessing answers where I wasn’t certain, and including
a fictional breakdown of services because I charge a flat fee. An American
insurance clerk would post it on the office bulletin board for general
amusement. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Two weeks later, a check arrived. Foreign insurers are
not up to speed, but they’re trying.</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> </span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-91455085781190884112020-12-23T05:42:00.006-08:002020-12-23T05:43:09.079-08:00Ultimatums Are Risky<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14pt;">Could I see a gentleman at the Omni with an upset
stomach? <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">The dispatcher for International Assistance was
delighted to learn that I could. In most cities, dispatchers work hard to find
a doctor willing to make a housecall but not in Los Angeles. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">I copied the guest’s name, age, room, and insurance
I.D. I quoted a fee. That was acceptable. I said I would arrive within an hour.
He was pleased to hear that. Then I dropped the bomb. I would need a credit
card number. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">I could hear the air go out of his balloon. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">“We always send a guarantee of payment.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">“You do. But then you don’t pay.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">Many travel insurers pay promptly. Others require
repeated phone calls. Pestering a billing department relentlessly usually
works, but sometimes I run out of patience, and many visits for International
Assistance remained unpaid after six months. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">“I’m not sure we have a credit card.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">“Yes, you do. Ask your supervisor.” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">All travel insurers have company credit cards but they
vary greatly in their willingness to give them out. Some do it routinely.
Others require an ultimatum. I hated hearing from Universal Assistance until
they coughed up a credit card number. Now I love it when they phone. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">But ultimatums are risky. The dispatcher agreed to
consult his supervisor and call me back, but I never heard from him. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;"> </span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-8724014869174466932020-12-19T05:57:00.002-08:002020-12-19T05:57:20.936-08:00A Rash During the Rush Hour<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">A guest in Long Beach had broken out in red spots. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">This looked like a terrific visit; skin problems are
easy. A sudden rash is frightening but hardly ever indicates something serious.
I have no objection to making a diagnosis over the phone, but guests are
terrible at describing a rash’s appearance. In any case, most want the doctor
to look at it. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">My only problem was that the call arrived at 5 p.m. on
a Friday, and Long Beach is thirty miles away. I avoid long drives during the
rush hour, so I told him I could come around 9. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">That wouldn’t work, he replied. He had a long business
engagement that evening. But he’d be happy to see me the following morning. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Saturday morning drives are easy, but a rash that
arrives quickly often departs quickly. I wanted this visit, so I told him I
would be there in an hour. Or two.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> </span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-4328915959745437532020-12-15T06:41:00.005-08:002020-12-15T06:41:47.375-08:00Hitting the Jackpot<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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</p><p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">A call arrived
during breakfast. Half an hour later the phone rang again. I was pleased
because it was an ideal time for multiple housecalls.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I exercise before
noon because later the gym becomes crowded. Two morning housecalls makes
arriving before noon impossible. This doesn’t happen often, so I reward myself
by skipping the gym without feeling the usual guilt. An hour of exercise is as
exciting as an hour brushing your teeth, and I’m deeply suspicious of anyone
who claims to enjoy it.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Even better, the
second patient was at the same hotel, a rare treat! A downside was that both
seemed to be suffering my least favorite illness: a viral respiratory
infection. You’ve heard plenty about my reluctance to give antibiotics when
they won’t help.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">My good luck held.
The first guest had a cough and high fever, probably pneumonia because
listening to her lungs revealed abnormal noises. In an otherwise healthy
person, pneumonia is the only common chest infection that medical science can
cure. So I cured her.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">On another floor, I
examined a middle-aged man who explained that he had bronchiectasis. This is an
uncommon condition in which a small area of the lung becomes obstructed,
causing frequent infections. This was another, so I gave him antibiotics in
good conscience.</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">These were satisfying encounters, but there was a
downside. Because both were at the same hotel, I finished before 11 o’clock,
too early to skip my workout. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> </span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-73858329861941602342020-12-11T05:58:00.001-08:002020-12-11T05:58:26.148-08:00Broken Glasses<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14pt;">An elderly lady gestured me to come in. As I followed, she remained
silent, a sign that she spoke no English. If someone doesn’t know “hello”
comprehension is generally poor.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span> <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">“Portuguese.” she said.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>“Speak
Spanish?” <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">When I shook my head, she took up her cell phone. The first number
didn’t answer. The second, after a short conversation in Portuguese, proved
unfruitful. She continued dialing. She was Brazilian, and most South American
travelers have travel insurance. If I phone the insurance agency’s 800 number,
someone will interpret. Unfortunately, my call hadn’t come from a travel
insurer but a national housecall service, Expressdoc. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">I could phone Expressdoc and ask for the agency’s number, but that
makes them uncomfortable. Housecalls is a viciously competitive business. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">The lady finally found a multilingual friend, and we proceeded with the
consultation, passing the phone back and forth. As usual, delivering medical
care was the easiest part. She had broken her glasses. She complained of a
headache, but it was clear that she wanted a doctor’s note so insurance would
pay for a replacement.</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;"> </span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-12794960016930280572020-12-07T06:01:00.000-08:002020-12-07T06:01:04.963-08:00A Prominent Scam<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">A guest at the Luxe explained that he was in town for six weeks and
needed a disabled parking pass. I told him that was not something I handled. He
added that he had the Department of Motor Vehicles form. All he needed was a
signature. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I offered to come to the hotel, but – even at half my usual fee – he
didn’t want to pay. I could have politely withdrawn, but he might then ask the
hotel to recommend another doctor, never a good idea. As I do when it’s an easy
service, I told him I would sign the form gratis if he came to my house. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">After hanging up, I felt uneasy. Eleven percent of Los
Angeles drivers have a disabled parking pass; it’s clearly a scam, and I didn’t
want to add to it. What if I had to refuse him? When guests complain after I
refuse narcotics, hotel management takes this with a grain of salt, but a
parking pass…. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt 498.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">You can imagine my relief when I answered his knock and saw that he had
only one leg.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> </span></p>
<p> </p>Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-40458205682027877162020-12-03T06:20:00.005-08:002020-12-03T06:21:19.298-08:00The Year of Viagra<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14pt;">National FDAs in Europe and Asia approve new drugs
after deciding that the benefits outweigh the risks. Aware that bad side-effects
produce an avalanche of lawsuits, America’s FDA takes more care. No matter how
many lives a new drug will save, it wants the risk to be minuscule. This is
hard, so our FDA takes a long time to make up its mind. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">As a result, other nations often have access to new
treatments years before America. Doctors complain all the time, but no one
expects the FDA to change. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">There was a delightful exception: Viagra, discovered
in Britain but first released in the US. It’s my impression that no foreign
businessman in 1998 considered his US trip a success unless he returned home
with a bottle. My records show forty hotel guests who summoned me with this in
mind. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">I love visiting guests who aren’t sick. While I have
no objection to filling certain prescriptions over the phone, Viagra is a
powerful drug with serious side-effects. Experts advise us to examine and
educate everyone who wants it. <br /></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14pt;">No one objected to paying for a visit, so I came and
asked about the guest’s medical history, performed an exam, and delivered my
Viagra education. It doesn’t enlarge the penis; it’s not an aphrodisiac, it
won’t prolong intercourse or delay ejaculation. It only encourages an erection.
No one failed my exam. One gentleman from Indonesia asked for 5,000 tablets.
Suspecting these were for resale, I worried about the legality, but this was no
problem insisted the happy pharmacist who called me to confirm.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-4075770461871491102020-11-29T06:02:00.005-08:002020-11-29T06:02:39.031-08:00Tricky Problems<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">It upsets me to
collect a fee and then send a patient to a clinic or emergency room for care I
can’t provide in a housecall. I try to anticipate these. </span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Many guests phone
after a painful accident, hoping I can do an exam and tell them whether or not
they have a fracture. Sadly, unless it’s visible to the naked eye, I can’t. It
turns out that medical science does little for broken toes, ribs, or noses, and
most common fractures (arms, wrist, hand, finger, foot, ankle) are not
emergencies. If a guest is willing to wait till office hours, I can make them
an appointment with an orthopedist.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Upset stomachs make
up the second most common ailment that I hear about. These usually don’t last
long, and I carry medicines that help. Stoics often prefer to wait. This is not
unreasonable, but the longer symptoms – usually vomiting – last, the less
likely that medicine will help. After about a day of vomiting this becomes so
unlikely that I send the guest to where they can receive IV fluids.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Abdominal pain is
usually benign in a young person but less so as the years pass, and it’s
tricky. Entire books have been written on it. I recommend the shortest:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Early Diagnosis of the Acute Abdomen by
Zachary Cope, a British surgeon. He wrote it in 1921, and revised it every few
years till he died in 1971. </span></p><p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">You can download it free. He’s a droll and witty
writer, easy for laymen to understand.</span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-90770721182137520482020-11-25T06:58:00.006-08:002020-11-25T06:58:54.055-08:00When the Doctor Needs Your Help<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Almost every hotel
guest that I see is working or taking an expensive vacation, so illness is more
inconvenient than usual. Everyone agrees that doctors have no magical powers….
except… maybe… if you really need magic….. </span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">What if you’re
scheduled to deliver an important speech or attend a wedding or visit
Disneyland, and you absolutely can’t be sick? In that urgent situation, a smart
doctor might come up with a cure that he or she keeps in reserve for such
situations.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Doctors love to
help you, but they also want you to feel helped. If we do our best, but you’re
unhappy, that hurts more than you realize. </span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">So if you want the
doctor to prescribe a placebo make it absolutely clear that you will be
disappointed unless you get “something.” This happens so often that many
doctors assume every patient yearns for magic. That’s why, for example, giving
useless antibiotics for respiratory infections is not a sign of incompetence.
Even good doctors do it.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Really, I don’t
hold anything back for especially deserving patients. It sounds odd, but if you
don’t want a placebo, let the doctor know. Say something like “I just want to
know what’s going on. If a prescription won’t help, that’s fine with me.”</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">That sounds like
you’re telling the doctor how to do his job, but many need your help.</span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-60634852830564693092020-11-21T06:11:00.006-08:002020-11-21T06:11:48.627-08:00Not Again! Again.<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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</p><p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I was minding my own
business on a plane returning to Los Angeles when I heard the elderly
man in the adjacent middle-seat say:<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span>“Victoria... Victoria?.... Victoria?...<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>VICTORIA!!...” Turning, I saw that he was
shaking his wife who had passed out.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I informed the
flight attendants who produced the traditional oxygen bottle plus a stethoscope
and blood pressure cuff and made the usual request for any doctor on the plane.
The wife began responding, if groggily. Her blood pressure was undetectable,
but engine noise made listening difficult.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">By this time,
another doctor arrived. She was about forty years younger than I and anxious to
be involved. She suspected it might be necessary to land the plane. This is not
a decision airlines make lightly. Headphones and a long cord appeared, and,
after some delay, she spoke to a doctor on the ground who advised taking the
wife to the rear of the plane, laying her on the floor, starting an intravenous
line, and observing. With the other doctor leading the way, everyone trundled up
the aisle. I wasn’t required.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">The couple returned
to their seats when the plane began its approach two hours later. The wife
seemed all right although she had no memory of what had happened. Paramedics
came on board at the gate and led the couple away. </span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I waved off the
flight attendants’ thanks, but they insisted on giving me five thousand
frequent flier miles.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-14306245302266574382020-11-17T06:02:00.006-08:002020-11-17T06:02:56.763-08:00What Makes Travelers Sick<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">American water.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Travelers worry
that our fierce advocacy of the free market includes opposition to government
meddling in the water supply. I regularly assure them that all American tap
water is drinkable.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">American food.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">No one believes
that Taco Bell or McDonald’s sell healthy food, but foreigners worry that these
exotic, colorful substances are toxic. We Americans are warned about eating in
nations with poor sanitation; about one in three American tourists in these
areas get sick. If we’re careful, our sickness rate drops to… Actually, it
doesn’t drop. No one knows how to prevent traveler’s diarrhea. The Swiss get
sick when they come to the US.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Air conditioning</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Americans accept
air conditioning with even more enthusiasm than personal firearms, but most of
the world has never caught on. They tolerate it as an odd American custom but
believe that air from a machine is unhealthy whether it’s automobile exhaust or
a box in a window. When someone gets sick, they turn it off. I wear a suit, so
caring for foreign tourists during the summer is a painful experience. </span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Air Travel</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Travelers blame the
airline for any illness that occurs within a week of flying. This is not so for
aches and pains and unlikely for an upset stomach but true for respiratory
infections.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Stress</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Vacations are stressful,
particularly if children are involved. They miss their friends; they hate the
food; they prefer watching TV to sight-seeing; they refuse to adjust their
sleeping hours.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>It turns out that stress
makes everything worse, but it doesn’t cause anything, so there’s no reason for
the parents to get sick. When they do, it’s a respiratory infection, usually
the children’s fault.</span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-29759452939557118182020-11-13T06:13:00.002-08:002020-11-13T06:13:34.161-08:00Keeping a Child Safe<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">On days I don’t go
to the gym, I take a brisk one hour walk through my neighborhood.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">One route passes an
elementary school a mile away. Except for dog-walkers, the streets are deserted
at this early hour, but a few blocks from the school the sidewalks gradually
fill with children in their colorful outfits and backpacks accompanied by a
parent. Passing the school I overtake the adults, often in chatty groups, as
they head home.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Parents taking
their children to school…. When did that start?...</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I entered first
grade in Cleveland, Ohio, in 1946. The school was three blocks away. My mother
dressed me and showed me the door and, even in the dead of winter, I walked
alone. I met friends along the way. I never saw an adult.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">No big deal. But
halfway through the year I took a test. Afterward my parents agreed that I
could attend a special school for gifted children. </span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">It required a six
block walk and then a long streetcar ride. I made the trip alone every day. The
school had a cafeteria, but, for reasons lost in history, I left the campus at
noon and ate lunch, usually a hamburger, at a nearby diner. It cost a dime.
Remember, I was six years old. I never regarded this as odd, and no adult I encountered
gave me trouble except once on the streetcar when the conductor accused me of
not paying the fare (I’m sure I did). When I burst into tears he did not pursue
the matter.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">It was not all
smooth sailing. Years later in Los Angeles on the way to junior high, I
encountered a bully my own age who cuffed me around painfully. But it was only
one episode.</span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-726723098211522162020-11-09T05:43:00.007-08:002020-11-09T05:43:46.979-08:00Another Spiked Drink<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">It was one a.m. as
I drove Santa Monica Boulevard, but crowds packed the sidewalks in West
Hollywood, lining up to hear the latest band. A few blocks beyond, I parked at
the Ramada.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">A guest led me to
the bathroom where her companion lay in the empty tub, clutching a towel and moaning.
This was not the first time I cared for a patient in a bathtub or even the
tenth.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">“We’ve been out
drinking,” explained the guest. “But not more than usual, and she didn’t have
more than me. Do you think they put something in her drink?”</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">This was not the
first time I heard that – or the tenth. I’m puzzled at how often guests suspect
foul play when someone becomes violently ill after drinking. </span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">I examined the
patient as best I could without moving her because she insisted she could not
move. Afterward I explained that alcohol is a toxin that messes up the brain,
usually in pleasant ways but occasionally not. After delivering medication for
vomiting, I told her to suck on ice chips and phone if she wasn’t better in a
few hours. So far everyone has recovered.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-7345772006086793262020-11-05T05:52:00.005-08:002020-11-05T05:53:52.212-08:00An Exotic Travel Destination<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"> <span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Tourists come to
America expecting a strange foreign land. They usually leave satisfied, but
encountering an American doctor is an unexpected bonus, so everyone on the tour
gathers round, and I often go about my business in front of a large attentive
audience.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span></span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">My largest consisted of the entire company of the
Chinese Peking Opera lined up along the wall of a ballroom in the Hollywood
Roosevelt. One of its members had begun behaving bizarrely. I concluded he was
suffering an anxiety attack which a tranquilizer might help. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> This took place well before Chairman Mao’s influence
became passé, so it was likely the Opera’s resident physician had no Western
training. Etiquette demanded I treat him as a colleague, so I presented my
advice as a suggestion. </span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="mso-pagination: none; tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> After consulting other senior figures, he gave his
approval. No one except the interpreter spoke English, so many subtleties were
lost, but everyone seemed satisfied, and the entire troupe lined up to shake my
hand.</span></p>
<p class="MsoNormal" style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;"> </span></p>
Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-846820090103689983.post-27964373583830186822020-11-01T06:22:00.004-08:002020-11-01T06:22:28.861-08:00Doctors Are Always Late<p><!--[if gte mso 9]><xml>
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</p><p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">At 6 p.m. on a
Friday, I learned that a flight attendant in Costa Mesa had
a cold. I prefer not to drive 46 miles during the rush hour, so I promised to
be there between nine and ten. That was acceptable. Airline crew are not
demanding.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Five minutes later
a guest at the downtown Doubletree asked for a visit. This was a bad
juxtaposition. Scheduling it for after Costa Mesa meant an arrival time near
midnight. </span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Reluctantly I told
her to expect me at around eight. I gave myself over an hour for a 25 minute
drive, but traffic was not so bad, and I arrived early, but she was there. The
freeway to Costa Mesa was also not so bad, and this time no one answered my
knock at 8:30. The front desk was unhelpful.<span style="mso-spacerun: yes;">
</span></span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">Airlines have
strict rules about sick crew, so this guest required a visit. If I waited an
hour and then left, I might get a call on the way home. If she was out
partying, I might get it several hours later. I did not acquire my peerless
reputation by refusing calls, so I’d have to make the return trip.</span></p>
<p style="tab-stops: 426.0pt;"><span style="font-size: 14.0pt;">As I fumed and
paced, the guest returned. I expressed relief, but she did not apologize. She
was present at the appointed time, and no one expects a doctor to be early. </span></p>
<p> </p>Michael Oppenheim, MDhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/17098242293395905728noreply@blogger.com0